🩸The Unholy Gambit – Premium Occult Symbolism Board Shorts (Unisex)
Descend into the infernal symphony of sigils, symbols, and style with “The Unholy Gambit”—a hellishly bold pair of board shorts that merge ancient occult iconography with modern punk devilry. Designed for those who walk between the mundane and the macabre, these shorts are your battle-ready armor for beach days, rituals, conventions, or casual urban mischief.
🕯️ Design Breakdown:
Each inch of these shorts is drenched in deliberate symbolism—inked in a monochrome chaos of infernal energy. Scattered across a black void are hand-drawn emblems: inverted pentagrams, the Leviathan Cross, the Seal of Lucifer, repeating 666s, demonic eyes, and the sacred monogram of damnation. All of it is framed in chaotic symmetry, designed to command stares and start conversations.
But the left leg unveils the centerpiece: a retro-toon Baphomet, reborn in rebellious cartoon flair—equal parts cute and cursed. Crowned with a candle and branded with goatish grin, he struts with chaos incarnate in his step. His playful menace perfectly mirrors the duality of good and evil, shadow and light—a visual sermon from The Astral Merchant’s diabolical design altar.
🧵 Product Features:
-
💀 Fabric of the Forsaken: Made with 100% lightweight, breathable polyester (3.2 oz/yd²), for wicked comfort during hot rituals or summer skate sessions.
-
🔗 Ritual Ready Fit: Regular cut with a secure elastic waistband and functional black drawstring rope—convenient for summoning demons or just skating the block.
-
🖤 Pockets of Power: Dual side-seam pockets offer easy access to your arcane relics… or just your phone and keys.
-
✂️ Stitched in Shadows: Thread colors are automatically matched (black or white) to maintain the flow of dark energy throughout the garment.
📏 Size Guide:
| Size | Waist Width (in) | Length (in) |
|---|---|---|
| S | 14.57 | 18.11 |
| M | 15.55 | 18.50 |
| L | 16.54 | 18.90 |
| XL | 17.52 | 19.29 |
| 2XL | 18.50 | 19.69 |
♻️ As always, The Astral Merchant proudly covers your sales tax and donates a portion of every sale to plant a tree—because even the darkest souls deserve a greener afterlife.
🔥 Whether you’re diving into sacred waters or just vibing with the abyss, these shorts are your key to unlocking unholy comfort with unmistakable style.
EU representative: HONSON VENTURES LIMITED, gpsr@honsonventures.com, 3, Gnaftis House flat 102, Limassol, Mesa Geitonia, 4003, CY
Product information: Generic brand, 2 year warranty in EU and Northern Ireland as per Directive 1999/44/EC
Care instructions: Do not dryclean, Iron, steam or dry: low heat, Tumble dry: low heat, Do not bleach, Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F)
Descend into the infernal symphony of sigils, symbols, and style with “The Unholy Gambit”—a hellishly bold pair of board shorts that merge ancient occult iconography with modern punk devilry. Designed for those who walk between the mundane and the macabre, these shorts are your battle-ready armor for beach days, rituals, conventions, or casual urban mischief.
🕯️ Design Breakdown:
Each inch of these shorts is drenched in deliberate symbolism—inked in a monochrome chaos of infernal energy. Scattered across a black void are hand-drawn emblems: inverted pentagrams, the Leviathan Cross, the Seal of Lucifer, repeating 666s, demonic eyes, and the sacred monogram of damnation. All of it is framed in chaotic symmetry, designed to command stares and start conversations.
But the left leg unveils the centerpiece: a retro-toon Baphomet, reborn in rebellious cartoon flair—equal parts cute and cursed. Crowned with a candle and branded with goatish grin, he struts with chaos incarnate in his step. His playful menace perfectly mirrors the duality of good and evil, shadow and light—a visual sermon from The Astral Merchant’s diabolical design altar.
🧵 Product Features:
-
💀 Fabric of the Forsaken: Made with 100% lightweight, breathable polyester (3.2 oz/yd²), for wicked comfort during hot rituals or summer skate sessions.
-
🔗 Ritual Ready Fit: Regular cut with a secure elastic waistband and functional black drawstring rope—convenient for summoning demons or just skating the block.
-
🖤 Pockets of Power: Dual side-seam pockets offer easy access to your arcane relics… or just your phone and keys.
-
✂️ Stitched in Shadows: Thread colors are automatically matched (black or white) to maintain the flow of dark energy throughout the garment.
📏 Size Guide:
| Size | Waist Width (in) | Length (in) |
|---|---|---|
| S | 14.57 | 18.11 |
| M | 15.55 | 18.50 |
| L | 16.54 | 18.90 |
| XL | 17.52 | 19.29 |
| 2XL | 18.50 | 19.69 |
♻️ As always, The Astral Merchant proudly covers your sales tax and donates a portion of every sale to plant a tree—because even the darkest souls deserve a greener afterlife.
🔥 Whether you’re diving into sacred waters or just vibing with the abyss, these shorts are your key to unlocking unholy comfort with unmistakable style.
EU representative: HONSON VENTURES LIMITED, gpsr@honsonventures.com, 3, Gnaftis House flat 102, Limassol, Mesa Geitonia, 4003, CY
Product information: Generic brand, 2 year warranty in EU and Northern Ireland as per Directive 1999/44/EC
Care instructions: Do not dryclean, Iron, steam or dry: low heat, Tumble dry: low heat, Do not bleach, Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F)
Descend into the infernal symphony of sigils, symbols, and style with “The Unholy Gambit”—a hellishly bold pair of board shorts that merge ancient occult iconography with modern punk devilry. Designed for those who walk between the mundane and the macabre, these shorts are your battle-ready armor for beach days, rituals, conventions, or casual urban mischief.
🕯️ Design Breakdown:
Each inch of these shorts is drenched in deliberate symbolism—inked in a monochrome chaos of infernal energy. Scattered across a black void are hand-drawn emblems: inverted pentagrams, the Leviathan Cross, the Seal of Lucifer, repeating 666s, demonic eyes, and the sacred monogram of damnation. All of it is framed in chaotic symmetry, designed to command stares and start conversations.
But the left leg unveils the centerpiece: a retro-toon Baphomet, reborn in rebellious cartoon flair—equal parts cute and cursed. Crowned with a candle and branded with goatish grin, he struts with chaos incarnate in his step. His playful menace perfectly mirrors the duality of good and evil, shadow and light—a visual sermon from The Astral Merchant’s diabolical design altar.
🧵 Product Features:
-
💀 Fabric of the Forsaken: Made with 100% lightweight, breathable polyester (3.2 oz/yd²), for wicked comfort during hot rituals or summer skate sessions.
-
🔗 Ritual Ready Fit: Regular cut with a secure elastic waistband and functional black drawstring rope—convenient for summoning demons or just skating the block.
-
🖤 Pockets of Power: Dual side-seam pockets offer easy access to your arcane relics… or just your phone and keys.
-
✂️ Stitched in Shadows: Thread colors are automatically matched (black or white) to maintain the flow of dark energy throughout the garment.
📏 Size Guide:
| Size | Waist Width (in) | Length (in) |
|---|---|---|
| S | 14.57 | 18.11 |
| M | 15.55 | 18.50 |
| L | 16.54 | 18.90 |
| XL | 17.52 | 19.29 |
| 2XL | 18.50 | 19.69 |
♻️ As always, The Astral Merchant proudly covers your sales tax and donates a portion of every sale to plant a tree—because even the darkest souls deserve a greener afterlife.
🔥 Whether you’re diving into sacred waters or just vibing with the abyss, these shorts are your key to unlocking unholy comfort with unmistakable style.
EU representative: HONSON VENTURES LIMITED, gpsr@honsonventures.com, 3, Gnaftis House flat 102, Limassol, Mesa Geitonia, 4003, CY
Product information: Generic brand, 2 year warranty in EU and Northern Ireland as per Directive 1999/44/EC
Care instructions: Do not dryclean, Iron, steam or dry: low heat, Tumble dry: low heat, Do not bleach, Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F)